The One About Cable

So far this morning I have...

Locked myself out of my Charter account
Had someone reset my Charter account
Call and get my bill lowered
**because they tried to charge me for the time they came to my apartment to fix the internet - which, because of Charter, was not working.
Try to login to pay my lowered bill
Somehow lock myself out of my Charter account AGAIN
Get my Charter account reset AGAIN
Login to see that my bill has not in fact been lowered, and is still ridiculously expensive
"Chat" with a Charter helper to get this fixed
Had the Charter man, Edmar, try to make me pay the higher rate AGAIN
Explain to Edmar that I am not paying $35 for Charter to fix my Charter internet which did not function properly
Listen to Edmar get all confused about whether I should pay the higher bill now and receive a credit, or pay the lowered amount
Edmar requests I fill out a survey

The End.